Nervous Horse 2/2014

Dear Conservative Friends!

Western culture is saturated with images. We see them whenever we open our eyes. We see them in magazines, on television, and even on the Internet. A picture says more than a thousand words, but it takes exceptional artistic talent and vision to compose one that says words worth hearing — and even then, there are times when we would rather read the said words instead. On such occasions we might turn to a book or one of the few literary journals that still value the written word above the image. Nervous Horse is such a publication. We are pleased to discover that nearly all of the pieces ever published in Nervous Horse are completely readable on a text-based browser (such as ELinks, used and recommended by yours turely) and that the layout is clear and pleasant to the eye. One can but lament the harsh fact that most so-called web designers completely ignore the fact that there are people who might want to view their sites without images and that the experience of doing so is unbearable if the logical structure of the web document does not reflect the logical structure of the text. In the early days of the Internet, when text-based browsers were the norm, it was plain obvious to anyone to whom it conserned that the purpose of an HTML document is NOT to produce a certain visual design but to describe the hierarchy of the textual elements. Think of the blind who navigate the web with the aid of an auditory device. To them it is utterly irrelevant what kind of flashy distractions the front page is decorated with or whether the menu is located on the top or on the left. All they care about is finding the relevant links and distinguishing between paragraphs and different levels of headings — that is, being able to grasp the structure of the text and thus follow its logic.

Unfortunately in our current state of mind, as we think of where the world is headed, we cannot find the strength in ourselves to develop this line of thought any further. All we can humbly suggest is that you the reader visit your favourite websites on any text-based browser of your choice, make note of any incoherences, deficiencies and hindrances that prevent you from having a smooth and comfortable browsing experience, and report your findings to the ones in charge. As unlikely as it is that they would bother to make an attempt to correct their errors, we can place our hope in the slight chance that even a handful of them would stop and consider if they turely find it acceptable to carry on with what they’re doing and keep burying the scarse minority of readable content on the Internet under an excruciating flood of abrasive images — not to mention the endless horde of all kinds of abominable scripts and widgets.

It might seem appropriate to end this burst of discontent with the comforting and uplifting notion that »the future of the Internet is in your hands» — but unfortunately it is painfully obvious that this is not the case. As always, the vast majority are either too foolish to see or too heartless to care what kind of atrocities they are anxiously striving towards with their senseless ideals of progress and perpetual improvement. Evidently it has yet to occur to them that in this matter as in many others we have long passed the point where we have all we need and to add anything to that will only lead to excess and suffocation. Let those of us who know better not drown ourselves in sorrow but make best of the few humble fortresses still left for us and try to find some amusement in the madness we’re being raced towards.

To take our mind of the things mentioned above here’s a traditional haiku by A Person:

One dull afternoon

on my feed a message shows

quoth the wombat, »bump»

A Non-Haiku Review for Any Generic Lager

J. K. Giih

This urine flavoured beer

does not go well with lemon juice

or by itself.

Request information; See recipe

U. N. Ture

My team and I will help you build the perfect sales funnel.

Tomorrow you will wake up without a soul, kind of lobotomized.

Die gute alte Wirklichkeit ist nicht mehr.

As Darkness Falls

Icarium

It’s a Puzzle thats what it is, what surounds us and is inside us, encompassing Our deepest seacrets covered in one emblem of darkness. Trapping souls, in deep fantasy, hidden treassures in Ocean Depth. We can se but not feel, we can feel but not seek, we cant seek but lurk, lurk in darkness, seek that path, feel the surroundings. Blindness is not just a physical state. but also mental one, its reached and its Blocks it, searching outwards of darkness, finds light, will that be safe and without fright, NO!

To L. Pouru, Pour Vous

As Ecre Tadmirer

They forgot the sermons and drilled sweet nothings into the hearing void.

A cavern sat dripping in cinders.

I heard the clopping of a nervous horse whispered on the wind

And its distance, coming closer til it neighed and neared

I mounted its hide and rode a great ways

We sat by the oaken ridge and prayed to Evola

We imbued a yurt with the sweat of our loins

We travelled to the sea and let the ocean drops melt into our skin.

You left me soon after and I was heartbroken.

the secrets of the sauna,

Icarium

Erootic mystesime, is covering our faces with a gleeming scarf.

the evaporationg sweat, of damp intimicyof nakedness, burning rocks-

so hot, so damp, im fealing like 1000 centrigrates, yet below zero

the hero of the sauna, is the one of the ass of rocks.

Where is everyone and why do they all hate me?

T. K. Oih

I am trying to write content for Nervous Horse but my mind wanders.

I lost at the horses again.

If she respects me as a person, why doesn’t she love me in an erotic way?

I have a good reason to believe my penis is permanently damaged.

9.90 is a lot for a bottle of stout.

Who needs Alchemy when we have Qabalah?

Mystery is the enema of Truth.

95 percent of streetlights are lit for nothing.

Insects seem like sensible men.

The only bad thing about communism is democracy.

JFC

Little miss kitty

Sat on a titty

Eating and disemboweling prey.

Along came a human

Decided she knew what was best

And took poor kitty’s meal away.

Seth H. Monroe

Jocks who make the gay jokes are the same folks blatantly having their taints poked by burly, hirsute bullies fully ready to donate some face yolk. No one cares as donairs are meekly eaten with sweet sauce. Then, at the end of a rainbow is where they meet their elite boss.

Note to Self

U. N. Ture

What have you done today?

It’s no wonder she loves her husband’s boat better than she loves you.

Are you sure you want to exist?

Who gave you the permission to exist?

How have you contributed to the execution of the Universal Will?

Just because you have wounds on both sides of your feet does not mean you are the third cumming of Christ.

You are the worst kind of centipede, and I assure you there are no good kinds.

Consider Krishnamurti.

Penis

Icarium

Gwaooor, Gwaoooor, Gwaoooooor......is not the sound of a giant hammer smashing mountain........ Gwaoor, Gwaooooor, Gwaooooooor......is the sound of a truck head-butting through brick wall.

¡¡¡¡GWAAAAOOOOOOR!!!

Icarium

Dragonite controls one lemming named Lomax to save other lemmings. The FBI kept Lomax under surveillance for almost five decades beginning in the 1940s. The documents include accounts of Lomax as the target of death threats and extortion schemes.

Icarium

Im living under pressure,

Im grounded to this plane of reality, caused by the shifts of time. The warping curves of the spaceial curves, the body that is the fabric of space. Curving in space might surlu look like nipples, yet its property is more like the Anus. The hole of to shit.

Matter is an illusion, yet energy and mass is a key to understand space-time and vonvaying a giant mass of nothing is still a big nothing.

I’m shy and this is the bravest thing I’ve probably ever done

L. T. P.

If it’s decency you want, don’t come in this room! The following stunts were performed under the influence of a powerful aphrodisiac. Champagne doesn’t change the Cosmos. One cannot scratch his head with a hat on. Eternity knocks at the door of our hearts and seeks to enter . . . This is an emotional moment for all of us.

Another tentacle rape. I won’t struggle and hide the particulars from you. The wand is erect, and must extend to infinity. It’s dripping everywhere! Why can’t I find the hole? It’s so soft . . . I don’t even wanna eat it, I just wanna hold it against my naked skin . . .

I have a subconscious desire to slaughter babies. I am a combat cyborg sent from the future to kill you. You animals don’t deserve such a luxury as mercy. Until my impulses die, my lust fills me to the brim. If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I’d be walking in my garden forever. Why do girls always seem to sense my desperation?

The Illuminati’s Reign of Terror is OVER!

L. T. P.

In this chapter you will learn to talk about your hobbies. Prepare yourself for an incredible adventure. Wouldn’t you like it if every morning your mind was filled with happy, positive thoughts? We have the situation firmly under control. Gravity is an ilusion if you have wings. Regardless of where your body is, your consciousness can be anywhere. The sun inside you is burning your gut. Will you answer its call?

No, everything is not alright. I am very vulnerable now. The path beyond is the road of darkness. I want to go to the junkyard because Jesus lives there. Invoke those horses of mental clarity! It doesn’t have to end like this.

The Divine always wins. A magician will suddenly come in a blue helicopter. He will show me a free movie. He will tell me happy birthday and give me 500 chocolate ice creams. Here is the machinery. Where are all the machinists? I adore who I am and have not once faltered. There is an avant-garde that cannot be defeated.