Artificial Sunbeams

Prologue To The Day We Landed On Earth, A One Act Play

Suscaluna Andriot Motte

(Exterior – a tall man and a short man sit in a field eating grapefruit)

Tall Man: The grapefruit is great, but how did I know to call it a grapefruit?

Short man: Probably because you are gaining superpowers from eating the grapefruit.

Tall man: Wow. You are so emotive. Let’s bang after we eat all this grapefruit.

(Slowly, the earth opens up beneath them, but they are too engrossed in conversation and grapefruit to notice.)

Short man: (Out of breath) Sure, but damn do we have alot of grapefruit. We probably won’t bone until 60 weeks later, at this rate.

Tall man: How long is a week?

Short man: Probably like 44 days.

Tall man: (mildly intoxicated) How long is a day?

Short man: Hmm…let’s eat more grapefruit and find out.

(The earth opens wide and after a short slide fall into the earth’s gaping hole.)

Tall man: NOOOOOOO!!!!! The grapefruits!!!

(They both die and all the grapefruit in the universe is destroyed)