the martyr

dogon von sirius

always claims to be poor

cannot burn gold to ashes

enjoys hurting others

has a propensity for violence

belongs in a straight jacket

causes enormous damage and destruction

is not very smart

often hides in the light

descends from ancient kings

is the answer to mankind’s problems

despises sodomy

has an affair with his legal secretary

is trying to justify immorality

loves the almighty god very much

is a solid rock of perfection

moves slower than a freight train

can stare at his shoes for hours

does not want to feel bad about himself

prays for wisdom and understanding

wants peace for all people

loves silence

will work for medicinal marijuana

is healthy happy joyful and whole

has a fragile self esteem and cannot handle criticism

places faith in extraterrestrial visitations

dreams that is a shapeshifting fish

hasn’t even packed his suitcase yet